What Direction?

Do you ever wonder what makes us strive for something?  What makes us give up one thing so that we can achieve another?  What makes us remove of selfishness to give to someone less able?  Why is it that when all else fails, we keep going?

When I look in the mirror I see a woman.  A woman that has given of herself for so many reasons.  Someone that has put her husband and children before everything else.  I have been that woman that has held the value of a child’s smile much greater than the trip to get my hair done or my nails buffed.  I have taken joy from their smiles to fill my heart with the joy to make it through a troubled time.

This is why I am who I am.  This is why I can look back on my days as a mom and feel that I have truly done a wonderful service to the world and to my God.  I know that coming from the background that I came there was little to no hope for me to be a successful parent.  There were not decent role models in my life.  There were not people that showed me the ropes of being a parent that God wanted.  But…God blessed me with this young baby boy that was so big he held his head up on his own before leaving the hospital, so big that he didn’t seem fragile to a young 19 year old girl, and healthy enough that I wasn’t a mom that worried about him not waking from his naps (granted, I still watched him sleep and touched his chest to make sure he was alive).

Yes, I was raised by people that were selfish, which taught me to be selfless.   I was shown how to choose addictions over everything else, so therefore everything else was my addiction.  I was taught how to say one thing and do something totally different, so therefore I do what I say I am gonna do (most of the time).

When it comes to role models, my husband and I had none until our baby boy was close to 8 years old.  Then, God sent us people from so many areas to help us see what to do the way God directs.  We were shown the right path to a happy marriage, not one that was dependent on the children being around.  We were shown how to raise a child to respect you because they want to not because they are commanded to so so.  We were shown how to express the true love we felt within our hearts.  The mentors we learned from were within our church home.  They were young, middle-aged, and older couples.  They had been married 5, 15, 25 years.  They had no children all the way up to 6 children.  We took pieces of those mentors with us as we taught our son and daughter to become what God has planned. Each day, we seek to learn more from Christ and I know that He will shine on us for simply seeking to please Him.

After all of my rambling, I actually have a point.  Don’t let your circumstances become your excuses.  Don’t allow the past to lay out your future.  Don’t allow the pain to keep your bottled up with fear.  Don’t repeat the past within your future.  Make your own!  God has a plan for you!


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