We have done it!! This is the final blessing of knowledge on this journey. (No worry, there will be more)
We complement one another’s strengths and weaknesses: In my house, I am the finder and seeker of all lost things. Keys, wallets, phones—you name it. My husband is prone to lose things and I am the one he turns to for help. I complement him in this way. I in turn am horrible in emergencies. I freeze. I am helpless and don’t know what to do. My husband is at his best in an emergency. He knows just what to do and does it with ease and calm. The longer we are married, the more I see how we complement each other and I rejoice in our differences. As Paul Tripp wrote in What Did You Expect?: “One way God establishes beauty is by putting things that are different next to each other. Isn’t this exactly what God does in marriage? He puts very different people next to each other. This is how he establishes the beauty of a marriage. The moon would not be so striking if it hung in a white sky; in the same way, the striking beauty of a marriage is when two very different people learn to celebrate and benefit from their differences and to be protected from their weaknesses by being sheltered by the other’s strength.”
Compliments: yes, this is why they say opposites attract. It is a well-known fact. We all are not alike. We may have similarities, but the majority of the time we are different. We both are big at planning things. We plan out birthday parties, special events, vacations, and date nights. We rarely do spur of the moment things. I am not saying we NEVER do them, but it is usually a planned event. This comes from a long line of living as though life was out of control and now we are in control.
We grew up in households that had no control and no goals. We decided, while still be separate from one another, that our lives would be planned. We still enjoy a spur of the moment dinner or date night. We still have fun and enjoy things that are unplanned, but we really enjoy the ones that are planned.
Birthdays come EVERY SINGLE YEAR, so why wait until the last minute to plan for them? We take great pride and joy in planning them out so they are fun for all that are included. We tend to plan each moment so that all are constantly having fun, especially with our children. We plan them out usually months or years in advance. Our daughter has already planned her next 2 birthdays. We just came back from a Spring Break trip that was planned to an extent. We planned on the places we wanted to eat and some of the events we wanted to do. Even though some of the things did not get done, we were okay, but we had made the plans.
Another thing about us is the differences. He enjoys watching television and simply hanging out at the house. I enjoy going and doing things. This keeps him from sitting all the time, cause he does tend to enjoy when we go do things. It also helps me to sit and relax, which helps me get some down time that is always needed. These things have brought us so many different aspects of our relationship that it has brought us closer together.
So, take time and enjoy one another’s differences and you too may grow to love them.