Marriage Lesson 15 of 20

Sorry that it has been so long since my last post.  I ended up with the horrible flu bug and was down for a week.  Then, I played catch up with school, work, and life.  I am sure many of you know what that is like. So, we will start again.

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This is a great one to start back up with, too!

We need friends that encourage marriage, not tear it down: Do you have people in your life who encourage you in your marriage? We need friends like that. We don’t need friends who listen to us complain about our husbands and then tell us we are right or who take turns comparing stories about who has the most frustrating spouse. We need friends who speak Biblical truth and point us to Christ. When we were first married, we had several older couples pour into our marriage with godly wisdom.

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My thoughts:

Friends are a huge part of many women’s lives.  Men have friends but so many of them are not as connected to their friends like women.  Women call their girlfriends and vent to get things off their chest or call to celebrate an accomplishment, or share a goal they have achieved with the friend’s help.  Men are usually happy to just say hi to one another once or twice a year, if that often.  So, a friendship is important to make sure it is healthy.

Your friends should offer you encouragement and ways to improve yourself or give you guidance in achieving your goals.  I am not saying that they should paint you a pretty picture of falsities.  They should be honest and tell you the truth, even when it hurts, but there is a gentle way to do these things.

See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people.
I Thessalonians 5:15

When it comes to marriages and friendships outside the marriage, there is a tough choice to make.  The Bible says to not hang with those unmarried if you are married and visa versa.  I know in these days that can be extremely difficult, especially when this person has been your friend for longer than marriage.  So, I feel that God wants us to keep it healthy and guard ourselves, especially our marriages.  You should not go out to clubs on “singles nights”, without your spouse, so they can meet someone.  I think group events are the best way to go.  Always take three or more friends to things like this or don’t go at all.

Also, make sure that you and your friend are encouraging the marriages.  If you are both married, then you should never compare marriages.  You are married to different people, hopefully, so they are going to act and perform differently in life.  I feel that you should be able to share your struggles and feed off one another on ways to SOLVE the issue, not pour fire on the boiler.  Lead one another down a path of joy and contentment, not loss and misery.  Help one another find a Bible verse that relates to the problem or go to a women’s seminar to gain encouragement and answers.  Prayer is always the first answer to all things and should be shared.

Where two or three have gathered together in MY name, I am there in their midst
Matthew 18:20

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