Marriage will change you: We often go into marriage with expectations of things we hope will change in our spouses. I know I thought that somehow my cooking would inspire my husband to like vegetables. Boy was I wrong! More often than not, what changes in marriage is yourself. God has used and is still using marriage to refine and shape me more into the image of Christ. As Tim Keller wrote in Meaning of Marriage: “Marriage shows you a realistic, unflattering picture of who you are and then takes you by the scruff of the neck and forces you to pay attention to it.” (p. 140).
My thoughts on the above:
We all go into a relationship thinking that we are who we are and are happy but the relationship begins to change us. We learn to compromise while thinking of someone else. We begin to want to give up our pleasures to see them receive theirs. We begin to feel that their life is more valuable then our own. Our lives become one and we are willing to do whatever it may take to make them happy.
We cannot change someone in to what we want them to be. We only begin to find value in their ways and their quirks become treasures. God allows us to see past our problems to see the greatness within the thing that bothered us.
Don’t go into a relationship and marriage thinking that you can make them into something they are not. We are the ones that will grow into something better!